Either Siberia or Depression: Я нeнавижу зиму.

Think the Siberian winter is starting to get to me, even though it’s not fully winter yet. These are the following things I see as evidence towards my Siberian based depression:
1. Not wanting to leave the apartment
2. Less desire to interact with people
3. Don’t feel like going to stores/buying things because it involves going outside/talking to people
4. Not cleaning up my mess
5. Sorta dropping the ball on a prospective roommate (via not cleaning up to show him the place)
6. Less desire to do work
7. General frustration with the Russian language
8. Not reading in Russian like I promised myself
9. Watching only TV shows/movies in English
10. Not getting dressed

Think that if I actually got a roommate things would probably be better (through increased human interaction). People keep saying I need a girlfriend, don’t want a girlfriend. Don’t even really want a girl heavily/emotionally involved with me. Trying to focus on music/work/writing. Not really working out as well as I planned. Need to start forcing myself to follow a ‘recording schedule’ so I can actually get stuff done. Need to not get so quickly frustrated when recordings sound bad. Need another musician to hang out/support my cause/make me do stuff.

If it is depression, I hope it’s the constructive kind that makes me good at expressing my emotions/creating ‘art’/communicating myself so I feel as though my output is representational of my current feelings. Need to make it not sound ‘whiny’ or ‘lame’ or ‘cliché’.

Notes

  1. rubpawpress reblogged this from keithbirthday and added:
    Culture shock. Feel better bro. Listen...some modest mouse
  2. keithbirthday posted this